By John McDonald
Memorial Day in Maine — our first “warm weather” holiday — is many things. It has always been a special day in towns and cities throughout the state, with parades and speeches.
In our town, after the parade wound its way down Main Street, folks would move on to the town cemetery for ceremonies, and then we would go down to the public landing for more ceremonies, including the throwing of a wreath on the water in memory of all those from our town who were lost at sea.
After the solemn observances were duly tended to, people drifted away from the town center and the public landing and eventually made their way back home, where some packed up the car and headed for camp.
Memorial Day weekend always meant the unofficial start of the summer season and the beginning of “yard sale” season. In the 23 years I’ve been writing this column, I’ve written more than a word or two about yard sales, garage sales, tag sales, flea markets and all the other cash enterprises that begin to blossom like ragweed over Maine’s verdant landscape. I’ve enjoyed drawing attention — as if they needed my help — to these vital commercial endeavors that are the granite foundation of Maine’s wonderfully creative and unregulated “cash economy.”
In all that time I’ve seldom taken the time to actually go to many yard sales and have not had a yard sale of my own to write about. Everything I know about the homegrown phenomenon I’ve observed from a distance while just driving by so many yard sales over the years. In those columns, I merely wrote about what I had seen.
All that changed recently when my wife Ann decided to have a yard sale in our neat, but not overly ostentatious, yard here at Storyteller Central. For days she organized all our unwanted stuff into various piles until she finally had enough piles to cover the lawn with sufficient eye-catching objects. These objects have to be impressive enough to cause otherwise cautious motorists going by the house to recklessly jam on their breaks and come to a screeching halt in order to get out and have a good look at the items being offered for sale.
Everything was beginning to come together for the big day and everything seemed to be going well — except the weather. On the day of the big event, it was raining and the forecast was for steady rain throughout the day. As everyone around here knows, if you’re planning an outdoor event in Maine during what’s supposed to be our warm weather season, it’s reasonable to assume that on the day you’ve selected for your special event, the skies will suddenly open and the rains will fall like they haven’t fallen since Noah’s time. In fact, although the Bible doesn’t mention it, I wouldn’t be surprised the learn that Noah’s wife was also planning a yard sale when the rains came.
My wife had made contingency plans, of course, so when the rains began to fall everything was moved onto the side porch and into the garage. Despite the rain, bargain hunters began arriving before 6 a.m. My wife had to tell these soggy early-birds she wasn’t ready and sent them away. At the designated hour, she uncovered the tables, opened the cash box and began to sell.
When we determined that enough commerce had taken place, our cash box was almost full and the last of the browsers finally ambled down the driveway and drove off, my wife figured she had done well despite the weather, which is all you can expect with a yard sale in May. What did I learn from having a yard sale right here at my own place? I was surprised to learn that things like ice cream makers are no longer hot items. Our “like new” Rival Ice Cream and Frozen Yogurt Maker — although priced to move — stayed right where it was, despite the fact that we still had the owners manual complete with recipes. It might be a while before we have another yard. I’ll let you know.
Maine storyteller John McDonald is the author of several bestselling books including “The Maine Dictionary,” “A Moose and a Lobster Walk into a Bar” and “John McDonald’s Maine Trivia.” His latest book, “Moose Memoirs and Lobster Tails,” is a sequel to “A Moose and a Lobster.” McDonald also entertains throughout New England, telling his Maine stories at banquets, conventions, conferences and other special events. Contact him at 207-240-8324 or maineauthorjohn.mcdonald@yahoo.com
